Thursday, March 22, 2012
Me: How's it going, old man?
Max: Bye, older lady.
Me: Where are you going, short person?
Max: Haha, very funny. You're smaller than Christian.
Me: Yeah, but I can still sit on him. And I can sit on you, too.
Max: Yeah, but you're just a midget.
Me: Too bad for you, since you have the same DNA.
Max: DNA? Who cares about DNA?
Me: Let's move on to another subject. What would you like to talk about?
Max: Something you don't want to talk about.
Me: Like politics?
Max: Maybe something different.
Me: Let's talk about unicorns. How many unicorns do you think it takes to make one unicorn burger?
Max: See you later.
Me: What? Did I upset you? Does the thought of a big, juicy unicorn patty make you cry?
Max: Wait, I need to go to the bathroom. For about, like, forever.
Me: Hmmm. Must have had beans for dinner.
(Several minutes later)
Me: Were you rapping in the bathroom?
Max: No! Maybe. Yeah, I did.
Me: That seems like a fun bathroom activity. What are your plans this weekend?
Max: Sleep, uhhhhhh, and other stuff.
Me: Sounds fun. I'm ready to go to sleep right now. How about you? You could get started on your weekend.
Max: Great! I'll do it a couple hours after you do.
Me: I may be funny, but I'm not stupid. Go to bed, you short little old man.
Max: Oh yeah? I think I can do more math problems than you.
Me: What's one little boy plus one bedtime?
Max: Equals Mom sleeping and little boy partying.
Me: Wrong. It equals 73.